I wish you a happy & prosperous New Year!
However, much of that happiness and prosperity will depend on you. Here are the do’s and don’ts for a happy & prosperous 2021:
Get a job that you love
You spend a third of your day at work and a third sleeping. In short, half of your active hours is spent at work. How miserable will you be if this time is spend hating your work or boss! Do not be that worker who keeps saying ‘I will leave this job’ as this will soon get to your boss and you will be fired unprepared.
If you don’t love the job, quit instead of whining. There are many people who pray for such a job and you are standing in their way. If you do not have a job, find something to do. Most people will develop suicidal thoughts or become bitter when they are idle. Work, on the other hand, gives people a sense of purpose. Working will therefore bring you happiness in the new year.
Settle old grudges
Settle grudges for you to be able to interact with people freely. Forgive those who wronged you and start the year with freedom in your heart. Stop holding people hostage in your heart for a happy & prosperous 2021.
Be happy for others
Some people behave as if one person’s good luck is the beginning of their hard luck. When the people around you succeed, you have a better choice of rising in life.
Imagine all your friends are working for big companies. Will there not be enough people in their networks who can give you a job? Imagine if all your friends were financially stable. You will never struggle to achieve any goal because they will have enough money to support you.
It is also said you get what you give. If you are not happy that others are succeeding in life, it means you do not want them to succeed. If you get what you give, you will never be successful. Being happy for others cost you nothing. Stop being jealous of others and celebrate their wins for you to also enjoy prosperity.
Update your skills
Things change very fast, and if you stick with what you know, you will soon be irrelevant. With obsolete skills, you will be stagnant and the market will spit you out.
You need to keep up with the recent trends in your industry. Learn new skills and become a master in your field, and you will never lack a source of income. That is what will bring you prosperity in 2021.
Build quality relationships
We are living in times where we have friends for purpose A or B. Friends who call only when they need something. Friends who do not include us in their list of friends. Friends we cannot count on. Evaluate your friends.
Find what values you share, and if your relationship has any goals. Is it mutual friendship or is it one-sided? Do they even consider you their friend? If they do not qualify as friends, let them go. For a happy & prosperous 2021, go out there and get yourself friends you can count on.
Go for what you want in life
Time moves very fast, and they say you cannot recover lost time. Today you have all the time you need to do whatever you want. Have you refused to find time to travel, only to get jealous when others post happy holiday pictures on social media?
Have you failed to find yourself the spouse of your dreams, only to be jealous of people who look happy in their relationships? Whether you dropped out of school or not, you can always acquire a degree in your preferred field.
Whether you are educated or not, you can always get the job you want. Buy the car or house you need. Marry the spouse of your dreams. Live the life you’ve always wanted. The secret is starting now because if you do not do it now you will be full of regrets when it is too late to do it. You will hate people who went after what they wanted in life.
Blaming others for your failure
So your parents were too poor to take you to college and you had to drop out of Form 3? If you have still not thought of finding money to take yourself back to school, you are to blame.
So your father was a drunkard and drunk your Form One fees, forcing you to drop out? He is not to blame for your lack of education years later.
So your teacher hated you and this made you fail the subject? No, you chose to hate the subject hence failed.
So you failed to get married because you have a child and men have been ridiculing you? No, you are single not because of your children, but because you chose to.
So you married someone who does not give you any support, they want you to do everything by yourself and this is why you are not achieving any goals? No, you are not achieving your goals because you do not want to.
Come on! At 20+ you cannot be blaming your parents, ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, wife, husband or relatives for pushing you to the corner you are currently in.
You have everything it takes to get where you want in life. They say no matter how long you have been travelling in the wrong direction, you can always turn. Take a charge of your life in 2021 and enjoy happiness & prosperity this New year!
Forcing people to fundraise for your causes
COVID 19 has brought many deaths in almost all families. In 2020, families were reeling from the pain of the loss of jobs and their loved ones. And this is normal in life.
Some people choose to fight their battles in private because as the Swahili say, ‘Mtu hujikuna ajipatapo’ translated as ‘You can only scratch where your hands can reach.’
However, some people believe the world owes them the world. There are old school mates who will show up from nowhere, add you to a Whatsapp group you think is for reconnecting, only for them to start asking for money.
I have seen friends removed from Whatsapp groups because they did not contribute to support others who had lost their family members. Some of the people removed had been burying relatives every month, and never ever asked for financial support.
There are others who will castigate others for not promoting their businesses. The affected have no jobs and cannot even afford basic needs yet the ‘business owners’ have no idea.
Others cut off friends for failing to fundraise for their weddings. Yet those friends are cohabiting for lack of money to fund their own wedding. Stop forcing people to raise funds for you, yet you do not know what they are currently dealing with. For a happy & prosperous 2021, start associating with people for who they are, not what they can give you.
Imposing your standards on others
There are people who look down on others because they don’t have such a fancy job, house, or car. You cannot expect everybody to have the same job, car, or house as you. Others wonder how you married such a spouse! They want you to be with someone who meets their expectations, yet they are single or in unhappy unions! Others cut you off because you are not making as much money, come from a poor background, support a different politician or political party, or go to a different church. In 2021, let people be who they are and you will enjoy great happiness.
There is this girl who had topped in KCPE exams. When she was interviewed, she said her goal was to become a pharmacist. Kenyans flooded hateful messages all over social media: ‘I also wanted to become someone big but I’m a watchman’ and similar hateful messages.
You have seen it with newlyweds: ‘Mtawachana tu (you will break up soon).’ You also belong here if you have found yourself saying ‘Hakuna bwana ya mtu Nairobi (Nairobi men are community husbands)’. And no, the man who marries a beautiful wife and a farmer who plants maize by the roadside do not have anything in common.
I understand that times are hard, but they are hard for everyone. Give people space to grow and achieve their goals. They say ‘To judge others is human, but to keep your opinion to yourself is having class.’
Bitterness and jealousy will block more doors than poor education. Learn to keep your negative opinion to yourself for a happy & prosperous New Year.
Judging others without the full story
I do not want to get into politics, but one thing you should know is that when someone wants to bring you down, they will start by attacking your reputation.
I have seen this at the workplace and in politics. You must know someone who told a lie about a colleague whose position they wanted, or someone who lost their job because of a lie. It also happens elsewhere.
When someone tells you something negative about another, do not jump into action. Take your time to establish the truth. Mind you, gossip and happiness do not go together. The people you gossip and slander are the same people whose shoulders you could use as a ladder to climb up. For a prosperous 2021, stop judging others based on rumours or gossip.
Helping people hate others
One time I was working in an office we shared with a different company. During the first week, my female colleague warned me “That lady downstairs is a snob. Don’t even say hi to her. Pass her like she doesn’t exist.” This was not the first time someone warned me to hate someone who had not given me any reason to.
Another time I was trying to link someone up with a friend who could help them get a scholarship into Harvard. The person had passed well in Form Four and could have enjoyed studying abroad, but had been told negative things about me. So when chance showed itself, he said his relatives will help him find the opportunities later after attaining a local undergraduate degree.
Well, hatred kills the keeper and if you want to die quick, continue carrying the hate. Many times, the people you are forced to hate are the ones who hold the key to your next door. Open the doors to a happy & prosperous 2021 by saying no to unnecessary grudges.
Competing with others
Have you found yourself doing something because someone else is doing it? For instance, starting a business because your relative who grew up in poverty is making more money than you after they started a business?
The saying that ‘What you can do I can do even better’ is for such people who will never make it in life. Imagine abandoning your dream to compete with people who don’t care what you do or don’t do in life? Imagine yourself competing with your neighbour then they move to a different town or die and you must continue from where you left.
Sit down, decide what you want to do with your life, and then focus on it. The moment you start focusing on what other people are doing that you are not, you create room for failure. For a happy & prosperous 2021, compete only with yourself and ensure you are the best version of yourself by the end of the year.
Believing that everybody has your best interest
There is this guy who used to work for a friend. He was the top employee because he used to meet his targets.
His colleagues did not have the work ethic that brings results, and so they were always below target. After noticing that he was the boss’s favourite, they started telling him stories about how the boss grew up in a poor family. Why he was the one funding his current lifestyle. That he should also treat himself by stealing some money instead of just reporting everything.
Slowly by slowly, they won him over. Until one day someone told him ‘You have made your boss the person he is. He will close down the company if you quit. Go and open your own company and leave him the broke guy he was in campus.” The guy eventually gave in and went to open his own company with zero management skills.
Immediately he left, the same people started demanding his position! It also happens in relationships. Someone tells you to leave your partner so they can date them. And in many other contexts.
Before you pay attention to the advice of your associates, evaluate your goals and aspirations. Weigh their words carefully and ensure you are comfortable with the consequences of your choices. That way, you will enjoy a happy & prosperous new year!
Have a happy & prosperous 2021!